office work skills
The most important office skill was taught by George Costanza: look angry and people will think you’re busy working hard.
I found out at a previous position that the best way to get my work done was to be short with people. In that case they wouldn’t bother me, and I had more time to do my work.
Let’s not advertise this fascists’ work anymore
Your comment does not really fit in with all the rest around here, and I’d gladly watch you figure it out
100%
Unfortunately, looking angry makes us more stressed over time. Still, worth it if I don’t have to talk to anyone
Sounds like a good stand up comedy bit
This one hits a little too close to home…
Also, the word you’re looking for might be “abusive” rather than “strict”.
Extreme strictness is a form of abuse. These symptoms are particular, though not individually exclusive, to strictness. As long as you “behave” you avoid the material effects of the abuse. Other forms of abuse typically have fewer “rules” that can be used as safeguards.
The word you’re looking for . . .
Might be, but almost certainly is not.
It 100% is.
My parents were abusive in this way.
My wife and I are strict. There is a huge difference.
how huge of a difference?
It basically comes down to:
My parents: do it or I’ll kick your ass
My wife and I: please do it, here are the reasons for us asking and if you do it you get positive attention and possibly a physical reward.
If you don’t do it, we talk about why and we listen to the reasons they give and adjust our parenting style if necessary based on their feedback.
They then go and do it.
- How to be attentive to one’s surrounds
- How To project effort
- conflict resolution
- Extemporaneous creative modeling
Resume Ahh comment
Ahh
Self-censoring is cringe
Every time I read it, I just see it like the momentary pauses that President Obama made in his speeches. Makes it a little more interesting.
I enjoy using slang. Sue me.
Ok, Susan.
What the fuck does “ahh” mean in this context? I can’t grok this one.
Search engines are free to use.
No, don’t do that when it’s something so niche, it’s cringe and disrespectful. Most people probably assume it’s a typo.
Jeff Goldblum impersonator
Just when we needed one!
I apologize. I shouldn’t have been rude about it.
These are all invaluable survival skills, NGL.
It’s the resulting FFF hairtrigger readiness that’s fucking hell on the psyche, though.
What is FFF?
Fight/Flight/Freeze (though, some even add Fawn to that)
Aww, fawn! 🥹
Yeah, as a survivor of related experiences, finding out the latter two’d been recently added to this alliterative device was, frankly, a coldly epiphanous experience. 😅🤓
Ah, okay. I thought you were UAPWE. I was right 👍🏻
I am neither a writer nor an editor, though I certainly would prefer to be united (much less “international”, for that matter). 😶
Not if I constantly dissociate, self medicate, and avoid people to the point where I literally didn’t process the threat.
Sounds like processing the threat happened, NGL.
I may just be stuck on an old one then.
As the other person said, it really depends on what people mean by “strict”.
My parents were “strict” in that they enforced a bed time. Now I have better than average sleeping habits. So that worked out.
But I’ve also read about “strict” parents that, like, take doors off their kids rooms, or read the kids private messages, or other nightmares
Yeah, my parents made us leave our cell phones on the kitchen counter so they could read our texts every night, and they installed software on our computers that took screenshots every 5 seconds.
I wonder why I have issues with authority figures and privacy?
My folks were technology skeptics and limited access to screens. We had strict allotments of time to access electronics.
This taught us how to game the rules and make up arguments to justify our discretions.
They were also lawyers, so we walked into the first trap.
The video games in my house were downstairs, and one time I did a “Can I go downstairs?” instead of “Can I play video games?” when I knew they didn’t want me playing more games. Thought it was a clever loophole. Only worked the one time, but got jokingly referenced for the next ten years.
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Had my door taken off for playing my music too loud… Translation: We can’t yell across the house for you to “come here”.
strict ≠ abusive
My parents weren’t abusive but I still learned all of these except ‘manipulate to calm down’…
My parents were strict about things that didn’t matter. They taught swear words and being gay was bad but never taught me anything about surviving life or making money or managing hobbies or anything having to do with self growth or independence.
They limited my ability to grow. Along with society at the time and then blamed me when for it when I became an adult and was socially dysfunctional.
It’s weird… If you’re not teaching your kids no one really is. They’ll end up learning from entertainment or people taking advantage of them. But still people have kids like it’s a set it and forget it process and then blame the kid/person for not knowing x thing.
Anecdotal observation from college: Lots of people got hammered on a weekend, at least sometimes, but the people who couldn’t draw a line and keep it from destroying their grades were mostly the ones whose parents kept them rigidly controlled at home. It seemed like those folks had no practice in drawing their own lines because their parents always drew the lines for them, so when they were on their own they went nuts. The preacher’s daughter is a cliche with a lot of truth.
I’ve seen this myself too
What does “the preacher’s daughter” refer to?
The “Preacher’s Daughter” is a trope in a lot of media wherein the daughter of the local religious leader tends to be more likely to be a promiscuous troublemaker.
There’s a cliche about the daughter of the preacher being a total slut or otherwise problematic.
Depends on what you mean by “strict”. I think the meme is about the parents who get angry over little things but don’t actually pay attention to their kids much - the ones who just assume that their kids would not dare to misbehave. However when I was in high school, I also saw plenty of kids (often immigrants) who had successfully been taught to work pretty much non-stop. I think their parents watched them (or at least their grades) closely enough that they couldn’t have gotten away with anything. It seemed to work well - they got straight A’s, never got in trouble, and went to prestigious universities. I can’t think of a single one I knew who burned out or rebelled (while in high school - I don’t know what happened to them afterwards). However, the ones I got to meet were already filtered, with the low- and medium-achievers not admitted to that school.
No, it is about the ones that keep an eye on their kids at all time.
The kids are unable to do anything unless they find way to circumvent all that bigbrothering.
And if they need to lie constantly, they will gain experience in it.
It’s fairly straightforward to give a child no opportunity to lie about the things important to the parents, if the parents put in the effort. They can watch the kid come home right after school and sit in the living room doing homework all evening, and the school will tell them his grades and whether or not he’s behaving well.
Strict for strict’s sake is bullshit. Holding your kids accountable for their actions, enforcing boundaries, and channeling their energy into productive ventures might be considered strict, but that’s good parenting in my book.
Ok but tbf those are all great skills to have
That’s not strict, that’s abusive.
I’ve become so used to it that now I lie to any sort of authority figure or any authority adjacent figure out of habit.
looks like strict parents are the way to fit into the corporate world :p
Perfect training for a lifetime of unfulfilling work for insecure bosses!
I mean, I know plenty of kids who learned this without strict parents. School staff, daycare workers, business managers, cops… anyone in authority looking to impose rules also taught these lessons.
You’d think nobody on this sub has ever shoplifted before, ffs.
