Ladies and gentlemen, the dumbest person on the planet, Donald Trump.
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nasssty little canadianses
Trump is aging like a Nazi opening the Ark of the Covenant.
The difference is that Göring, Goebbels and Hitler cared about Germany. Krasnov only cares about Russia.
I know I’m asking a lot, but can anyone compile the list of everyone that Trump has called “nasty”? Because I feel like we’re in really good company.
“Hello, is this Canada? I got a vermin infestation in a White House that could use fumigation. Do it like how you did in 1814. It is too far gone to be saved.”
Let’s show lil’ don how nasty we can be.
Breaking out the Geneva Checklist?
“Nasssty Canada, with its healthcare and reciprocal tariffs!” Krasnov hissed. “It burns us, precious!”
He hunched over in the dim glow of the Oval Office, stroking a golden golf ball in his palms, his eyes darting between it and the maps spread across his desk. “They take advantage of us, yes they do. Always winning, always smug with their free doctor visits and politeness. Weak! But strong! It’s tricksy, so tricksy!”
A cough echoed from the corner. His chief of staff, a weary-looking man with thinning hair, cleared his throat. “Sir, this—uh—this meeting with Prime Minister Trudeau is important. We need to discuss trade.”
Krasnov recoiled, clutching the ball tighter. “Trade?! TRADE?! Filthy free-traders! They cheat us! Steal from us! But we—” He paused, his voice dropping into a desperate whisper. “We could… could take their milk, yes, yes! Their delicious dairy! Make America milky again!”
His chief of staff pinched the bridge of his nose. “Sir, we already produce a lot of milk.”
Krasnov’s face twisted, his fingers tightening around the golf ball like a strangling grip. “No! Canadian milk is special! It’s… socialist milk! It must be destroyed! We put tariffs on it, we crush them, and then we take it for ourselves, yessss!”
A flicker of doubt passed across his face. He shook his head violently, as though fighting himself. “But what if… what if Canada is right?” His voice softened, a pained expression twisting his features. “What if… universal healthcare isn’t nasssty? What if… it’s… good?”
He gasped, stumbling backward, horror-stricken. “No! No, no, no, never! That’s socialism! That’s evil! We hates it!” He flung the golf ball across the room, where it clattered against a bust of Lincoln and rolled onto the carpet.
His chief of staff stared, unsure of what to say.
Krasnov froze, then slowly crawled toward the ball, cradling it again in his hands. “We must punish Canada. Yes, precious. We must make them pay. Or else… or else we lose.”
A long silence followed.
Finally, the chief of staff sighed. “I’ll call the trade representative.”
Can we call on Andy Serkis to Narrate this please.
America has been subsidizing Canada
2024: Canada imports ~$480 billion total from the USA. Divided by 40 million Canadian population, that’s $12,000 for every man, woman, and child spent on American shit.
USA imports ~$586 billion from Canada. Divided by 400 million population, that’s only $1,465 per capita, and that’s only 1/8th of the amount that Canadians bought from the USA in return.
##BUY CANADIAN, BE FAIR!##
You can’t compare apples to apples when one side of the equation has 10 times the population. If we’re trying to be fair, Trumpistan needs to buy 8 times more Canadian shit!
Tariffs on the Canadian side will be reciprocal and will only serve to make us stop buying Murcan shit, leading to an even bigger Trumped-up deficit and the loss of their biggest, best customer. Likely long-term.
Oh you haven’t seen nasty yet, Donald.
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I have never known a man who needed to get punched in the face worse than Donald Trump. I am not a violent man. I detest “online tough guys” who treat every situation as an excuse to advocate for violence. And I’m not saying I endorse a bullet or a guillotine or something like that. I’m not even saying I’d punch him.
But this man has clearly never been punched in his shit-talking mouth, and if someone had done it 40 or 50 years ago, we wouldn’t be here now.
I’m not even saying I’d punch him.
I’ll do it.
Get in line.
And I’m not saying I endorse a bullet or a guillotine or something like that.
Hitler died from a bullet, fired from his own gun. His advisors were tried for war crimes, convicted, sentenced to death, and hanged. I think we can all agree that these were reasonable conclusions.
And I’m not saying I endorse a bullet or a guillotine or something like that.
Honestly, my greatest wish for Trump and Musk? That they have all their wealth and contacts stripped from them, and they either spend the rest of their lives in a blue collar prison, or homeless on the street without a single soul willing to help them… I’ll settle for the guillotine though.
I think that Gitmo is the only answer to prison for these guys. Send em where they send those they do not agree with.
He’s not dumb. He’s cancer. He’s aggressive. And he intends on metastasizing to the entire world. Strongmen only respect strength. We need to show him how nasty we can be. Watch what he does with targets he perceives as weaker than us (if there are any). If he goes after Panama first, or Greenland, you can be certain that we are next.
This is not empty rhetoric folks. I’ve been saying it since before the election and I’m going to keep saying it, he’s actually coming for us. His first term was full of empty threats. This one hasn’t been. He has followed through, and he will follow through. He will continue to bully us and come at us sideways for awhile, take what he can by hook or by crook, but eventually he will get impatient and greedy. He is coming. Prepare to be another Ukraine, another Afghanistan. The latter is a tiny, technologically backwards nation that is called the “Graveyard of empires” for good reason. We can be that, and we will need to be that. I say this to reassure you that it is absolutely possible to defend our sovereignty against a much larger aggressor. This is anything but a lost cause, but we need to take it very seriously, because he is deadly serious.
He absolutely is dumb. But that doesn’t mean he’s not dangerous.
He looks to us the way Putin looks at Ukraine.
Someone tell Doug Ford that capitulating to Trump is not going to pay off. He seems to be moving from big talk of resistance to total submission.
That what conservative do they would sell canada at the first chance but they have to look like big bad men so they bark a little then roll over
Yeah, I’m curious what changed. Did he get a payout to sell out his province and country? Was he blackmailed? Or was he just bluffing and America called him on it?
What changed is he just got elected for four more years. The facade of Canada First is irrelevant at this point.
SCOTUS declaring full immunity for anything done as an official presidential act is probably why this term feels less hollow; last time around he had to be careful not to end up in prison, this time he has nothing to fear.
Cancer is very dumb, by any metric I can possibly imagine:
- it literally lacks any mechanism for intellect/processing information
- it is a random mutation that renders affected cells dysfunctional
- it has no mechanism to spread to another host, yet still kills the host it has
- it has four different ways that it might just kill itself
This only makes the metaphor all the more apt. Intelligent foes are far less dangerous. You have to be exceedingly dumb to choose mutually assured destruction.
Nasty pasty, pudding and pie
Donald Trump was meant to die in prison.
Founding fathers would have had him hanging from a tree
“I deal with every country, indirectly or directly. One of the nastiest countries to deal with is Canada,” Trump said.
I’ll take that as a complement from you. Thanks!
Yeah. Tells me our government is working.
If he stops being adversarial on every situation and threatening us then we’ll be friendly, like we are with every other country.
Good. Proud to be Canadian.
