• norimee@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        56
        arrow-down
        10
        ·
        2 months ago

        Lemmy is a quite misogynistic place.

        Its often no fun to be a woman on here. They might rip you apart, if you say something slightly feminist (depending on where you say it). Made me think of leaving several times already.

        • Anne@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          42
          arrow-down
          2
          ·
          2 months ago

          Please don’t leave! Keep speaking your mind, if enough of us stick it out we can drown out the users like Captain Asshole here.

        • Danquebec@sh.itjust.works
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          31
          arrow-down
          2
          ·
          2 months ago

          I understand if you do, but I hope you won’t. I like this place despite its flaws and I hope it won’t turn into a far right community.

        • Nythos@sh.itjust.works
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          19
          arrow-down
          2
          ·
          2 months ago

          Block anyone or any instance you find regularly being outright misogynistic and slowly, but surely, create a better place for yourself.

        • prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          3
          ·
          edit-2
          2 months ago

          It fucking sucks. This place was great shortly after the reddit exodus. Now it’s just as bad, if not worse.

          As a man, are there any fucking online spaces that haven’t been co-opted by right wing interests? I’m sick of this “red pill” bullshit infecting the minds of young men in every corner of the internet. Nowhere is safe. I wish they’d crawl back into the holes they came out of.

          We are going fucking backwards and it’s infuriating.

          • norimee@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            2
            ·
            2 months ago

            I still have hope.

            On reddit there were also a lot of right wing nuts, incels and raging misogynists, but they tended to concentrate themselves into their own subs and echo chamber bubbles. If you kept yourself away from the “Manosphere” (like r/incels, r/MGTOW, r/MensRights…), the likes of TheDonald and the equaly disturbing misandrists of r/FemaleDatingStrategy it wasn’t that bad.

            I hope this wave of toxic behaviour towards each other is just some kind of growing pain and these toxic people will find themselves seperating into their own communities wigh time.

        • Maeve@kbin.earth
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          3
          arrow-down
          4
          ·
          2 months ago

          It’s not just misogyny. I’m watching the sweetest, most kind user getting ripped to shreds for posting articles from MSM about candidates across the spectrum, who are of neither major party. The toxicity is wild , self-justification more wild. In the short time I’ve been on Lemmy, it’s “gone to hell in a fast car and keeping it hot,” as I hear a user elsewhere say. about certain topics. I’m quickly becoming of the opinion the up and down votes get discarded and a randomized ranking algorithm put in place.

        • ObjectivityIncarnate@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          4
          arrow-down
          14
          ·
          2 months ago

          It’s not misogynistic to not want the half of humanity that gets murdered multiple times more often (over 3x in the US) than the other, to be erased as victims.

      • DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        5
        arrow-down
        3
        ·
        2 months ago

        Lemmy is filled with the most opinionated kind of Redditors and Russians it can fit on the servers, it’s a moderator miracle it didn’t go full incel.

      • Danquebec@sh.itjust.works
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        4
        arrow-down
        2
        ·
        2 months ago

        Hopefully it was from the perspective that the comment is not helpful in reducing the number of murders of women.

        I don’t know, I don’t personally see the harm in merely motivational comments or rants. But I thought it might be that.

        • acargitz@lemmy.ca
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          10
          arrow-down
          1
          ·
          2 months ago

          I honestly have no idea how any Lemmy comment might be helpful at reducing the murders of women.

          • Danquebec@sh.itjust.works
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            5
            arrow-down
            2
            ·
            2 months ago

            Maybe if they proposed some policy, or shared some stats and facts, instead of merely a statement of hope.

      • ObjectivityIncarnate@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        11
        arrow-down
        13
        ·
        edit-2
        2 months ago

        Not really. Specifically saying “end femicide” is like fundraising for breast cancer treatment, but only for men, who are a small minority of those with breast cancer.

        You are over three times less likely to be a victim of murder (in the US at least) if you are a woman, than a man.

        There is zero reason to oppose murder of one sex any more or less than the other, and it takes the same amount of effort to voice opposition for both, as for only one. So going out of your way to advocate only for the half of the population that suffers this fate far less often, understandably comes off as sexist and callous, to the objective observer.

        • LillyPip@lemmy.ca
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          10
          arrow-down
          1
          ·
          edit-2
          2 months ago

          How many in that statistic are men being killed by women? How many of those murders are the result of gang violence that’s predominantly committed against men by other men?

          I assume you’re referring to this stat:

          In 2022, the FBI reported that 14,441 men and 4,251 women were murdered in the United States.

          … which equates to about 79% of all murders.

          There’s a lot of nuance in that broad, sweeping statistic, but here are some statistics that are more clear:

          In the same year, there were 15,094 male murder offenders and 2,107 female murder offenders.

          … so the problem isn’t that more men are being murdered in general, but that an overwhelmingly larger number of men are murderers, and they target each other quite a bit. Gang violence stats are wrapped up in that 79%, and most gang violence is male-on-male.

          Here’s another:

          Among homicides in the United States, intimate partners kill almost 50% of female and 10% of male victims.

          Many of these stats are situational, making that overly-broad figure misleading.

          Also, the likelihood of being murdered increases quite a bit when a woman is pregnant:

          In 2020, the homicide rate for pregnant or postpartum women was 5.23 per 100,000 live births, which is 35% higher than the rate for non-pregnant and non-postpartum women.

          And that doesn’t include all the violent sexual crimes against women and girls, that are also committed at a far higher rate than against men and boys.

          The overarching fact seems to be that men kill men a lot, and they also kill women an order of magnitude more often than women kill men, so maybe the problem here is men’s propensity for violence.

          e: If that’s what you meant, I agree, we should be finding and implementing ways to reduce male toxicity in general, which includes many things like supporting mental health care and opposing norms (mostly within the online ‘manosphere’) that promote and foster toxic rather than healthy masculinity.

          • ObjectivityIncarnate@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            2
            ·
            2 months ago

            If the sex of a murder victim changes, at all, how you perceive the crime, you’re sexist, period.

            At least have the guts to admit it instead of pretending this is a noble stance.

            • Plopp@lemmy.world
              link
              fedilink
              English
              arrow-up
              1
              arrow-down
              1
              ·
              2 months ago

              The sex, gender, ethnicity etc of the victim, and the perpetrator, can give very important context that can point to very important issues that needs to be dealt with. If you’re alluding to the actual deaths of the victims being equally bad no matter their gender because they are all humans, then congratulations for passing the lowest threshold for human decency.

              Wanting to end femicide doesn’t mean you value women more than men, it’s pointing to a specific issue. It also doesn’t mean that other issues doesn’t matter.

              • ObjectivityIncarnate@lemmy.world
                link
                fedilink
                English
                arrow-up
                2
                ·
                2 months ago

                If you’re alluding to the actual deaths of the victims being equally bad no matter their gender because they are all humans, then congratulations for passing the lowest threshold for human decency.

                Yeah, and as low as that is, there are many in here who don’t pass it, so shame on them.

                Wanting to end femicide doesn’t mean you value women more than men, it’s pointing to a specific issue. It also doesn’t mean that other issues doesn’t matter.

                It’s the same sort of thing as when there was that big statement made some years back about ‘stop targeting women journalists’, alongside a statistic that 11% of the journalists who were killed over the prior year were women. In other words, ‘89% of killed journalists are men, so stop killing women’. At best, a statement like that comes off as foolishly ignorant–at worst, it comes off as callous and indifferent to male victims.

                • Plopp@lemmy.world
                  link
                  fedilink
                  English
                  arrow-up
                  1
                  arrow-down
                  2
                  ·
                  2 months ago

                  Everything has context, and context matters. Your can look at any issue from different perspectives and through different lenses. From different perspectives, different aspects of the context might be of different significance, etc. As such, there could very well be a perfectly fine reason to say “stop targeting women journalists”. But that doesn’t, at all, mean other perspectives are invalid.

        • acargitz@lemmy.ca
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          11
          arrow-down
          1
          ·
          2 months ago

          Wtf are you talking about. What a weird thing to write. I’m very much not OK with being murdered thank you very much.

          • Jax@sh.itjust.works
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            6
            ·
            2 months ago

            Listen, cut him some slack - it’s really hard to keep your hands dry when you’re writing inside of a bubble. They’re very soapy, and you can’t move too much or they’ll pop.