I had a borderline breakdown when I was a kid when I discovered that life was kind of set on rails: go to school, get a job, get married, have kids, work until you’re too old to function, then retire for a few years and wait to die. Any deviation from this plan would put me at risk of dying poor, lonely, sick, and very likely young. At least, that was what the adults in my life impressed upon me. I felt trapped, like I wouldn’t ever have a chance to just explore the world and enjoy life my own way without stressing about things that needed to be done.
For a long while, I fantasized about living the Swiss Family Robinson lifestyle: build myself a multi-level tree house on a deserted tropical island and live my own free life, far away from people and taxes and jobs and all expectations. I kind of idolized the hermit lifestyle. I just wanted to be left alone.
Then in high school, while I was stressing about what to do for college, an uncle of mine suggested the US Air Force. He said they treated you much better than any other branch of the military, gave you free college education, free travel around the world, free food and housing, free medical and dental, gave you some solid training and experience in a trade, and they even paid you to do it all! On top of all that, I could officially retire after only 20 years served and collect a pension for the rest of my life. It sounded too good to be true!
So… I went that route at 18 years old, served my 20, and now am fully retired as of 38 years old. Granted, my pension isn’t enough to be fully retired. But the military did break me a bit, and through several small things adding up, I earned 100% disability with the VA which pays way more than my pithy pension. Plus, my wife also served and was medically separated with a 100% disability rating as well. So with our 3 passive incomes and free medical/dental for life, we can be fully retired!
My father just passed away in January and my wife and I had been caring for him in my childhood home since I retired. So I’ve now inherited his home, which is on several acres out in the countryside. And I’m basically back to living my idealized childhood; free to do whatever I want with my days while relaxing in my childhood home. I have very few bills, no job, no obligations, and enough income to live comfortably. I’m not rich by any stretch of the imagination, but I make enough (and don’t spend enough) that I don’t have to be budgeting or micromanaging my bank account.
My wife and I also decided not to have kids. We watched as our friends and family all had kids, and no matter how much they all loved and/or hated the process of child-rearing, we saw how it hurt them mentally, physically, and financially. Plus, my wife has medical complications which would make her bedridden while pregnant and unable to take the meds she needs to function without pain every day.
In the end, we decided it wasn’t really worth all the effort. Besides, my wife’s immediate family all has mental issues, and there’s a huge chance any kids we have would inherit them too, so best not to take the risk. If we want children in our lives, we can go visit my sister who has two wonderful kids. We get our fill of being around children, then we can go home to our stress-free life at the end of the day.
So yeah, I think the young version of me would be very proud of where I ended up at 40. I’m not stuck in a dead-end job until I’m too old to do anything with my life, I’m not financially stressed, I have the freedom to travel, explore, learn, and just enjoy life every single day. I’m not lonely; I’m happily married to my best friend. My life actually worked out pretty well.
My younger self would be impressed with how much I know about circuit design and repair. My older self knows I could have done so much better if I had just applied myself instead of getting distracted by women.
A career in what was only a hobby when I was 16. And I’ve gotten to visit far corners of the world as part of it.
Honestly I look pretty good, physically, I mean, I was a cute kid, and then I just didn’t take care of myself and felt super bad in my own skin all throughout my teenage years, and today I’m very satisfied with my appearance, its an awesome feeling, younger me would have been happy to see how he’d turn out
Also my profession is related to the arts, so he would have been happy to see I kept ‘drawing’, but for a living
kicking heroin and cigarettes
Congratulations on that for sure. Those are some hard habits to kick.
cigarettes was harder.
That I’m still alive.
God i never thought i would make it to 18, let alone 22. i was a pessimistic kid even before leaving Islam and always expected the worst to happen. I feel like i got better since i stopped treating every possibility as a 50/50 chace even if i didn’t know the actually probability
“We convinced someone to be with us? Cool!” and also “we didn’t kill our twin??? Amazing”
Presumably my self growth, as it was something my younger self struggled with.
My younger ace self could never have imagined finding a partner. I was simply never even vaguely interested in anyone around me. Guess who’s buying an engagement ring soon?
I was a better, happier, more optimistic person back then, so I’m sure that they’d find something to be proud of. As far as accomplishments and aspirations, I don’t think I’ve managed any yet. Maybe someday!
I could’ve written this myself. I’m pretty stable now but I feel like it came at a huge cost.
I definitely feel like I pushed myself too hard over too long a period of time, I also held in too much because that’s what I was taught. It’s getting better though, we’re getting better
Having come out, gotten a husband, gotten counselling and started building a business, it’s been a good couple of years
When I was in third grade I lied to my classmates for some stupid reason saying that I lived in a three-story dome home with a hot tub on the top floor.
And today I live in a three-story dome home with a hot tub on the top floor.
Also, growing up I always said that a household should have at least three cars. A sedan or daily driver, a pickup truck, and a recreational vehicle.
I own a sedan, a pickup truck, and a Jeep.
The only thing left on my childhood bucket list is to become a multi-millionaire inventor. I need to get to work on that.
My first invention was a jigsaw puzzle that you could pick up and fold away without losing progress (velcro on the pieces and the board). It felt great at the time! I’ve been chasing that high ever since.
My lawnmower.
Bear with me.
When I was a kid my dad had a proper lawnmower. It was petrol-powered with a cylinder cutting head and a heavy roller at the back. A Suffolk Colt. There was something about it, the combined smell of petrol and freshly mown grass, the perfect stripes it laid on the lawn, the neatness of the cut. When I was old enough I was allowed to use it to mow the lawn. The only chore I was given that was pure pleasure. I loved running that machine over the grass, loved the the pull of the eager little engine when I opened the throttle, loved the sound, loved the smell, loved everything about it…
I’m in my 50s now, but it wasn’t until I bought my own, refurbished Suffolk Colt, about 10 years ago, that I felt maybe, just maybe, that I was a proper grown-up like my dad was. 10-year old me would smile and understand.
I didn’t wind up in the gutter like a lot of people said I would. I’m successful and slightly wealthier than the family I started in. I was naive as a young person though so young me might not recognize my life as successful.
I live in the place I always wanted to go back then
