Wiping your ass is a Democrat conspiracy to make you deprive your body of a critical microbiome that protects you from their propaganda.
Born to shit. Forced to wipe.
Am I wrong in believing that this whole TP advertising campaign was launched off of the idiom “does a bear shit in the woods?”
You are correct
Eddddddie!
Shameless Joel haver skit plug
I was going to respond with the almost identical SNL skit, but I guess they must have taken it down. Some writer had clearly ripped off Haver’s video.
It’s not nearly as bad as the YouTube commercial I keep seeing with someone trying to wipe chocolate pudding off a peach. It’s very… visceral. I have no idea what it’s for.
Seriously, buy a bidet.
Are you paying for it?
You get a bidet, you get a bidet, everyone gets a bidet! The same bidet for everyone!
I got two bidet attachments for my terlet for $40. Still working fine after 6 years.
Buys all of Lemmy
I want a bidet so badly for my paperey, shitty American butthole you don’t even know. I should start a gofundme
even the $20 ones online work for getting your ass wet. Heck, if you don’t have enough fiber in your diet like me, the cheap ones that spray harder are better!
Only takes a couple weeks to get used to cold water, too. There is A LOT of heat in an asshole, so it’s more refreshing than chilly after you’re used to it.
I mean, it’s toilet paper. That’s the product. They try to make it as euphamistic as possible with the cutesy bears and colored water, but in the end, every toilet paper commercial is trying to sell you on their poop wipers.
It’s no worse than the douche commercials we had to endure in the 70s and 80s:
But i loved making fun of those commercials. Mom? Do you ever… You know… Not feel so fresh? And yes, oh yess dear momma knows.