• Thorny_Thicket@sopuli.xyz
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    1 year ago

    As buddhists say; you can’t become happy you can only be happy

    I think it can be achieved but it may not be what most people think. I believie happines is not a goal you reach but rather a state that is realized. It’s when you’re satisfied with what you have and stop putting conditions on you happiness. Life is unsatisfactory - that’s what most are dealing with rather than unhappiness.

    • Buddahriffic@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      This is the philosophy that lead to my name. If you base your happiness on achieving goals or avoiding suffering, you’ll likely find happiness fleeting. You can look at people who most would consider great examples of success and still find miserable people and suicides. My guess for some of them is they get there, are happy for a time, and then when it eventually fades as they get used to their new position in life, they either think there’s nothing more they can chase or that something must be wrong with them if they can’t be happy and start feeling even more miserable because they have the problem of not being happy.

      Happiness isn’t a reward for achieving a goal, it’s a decision we make about what we feel about our current circumstances. If you’re not happy, you can change that by adjusting your circumstances or by adjusting your expectations. Both of those are worthwhile pursuits, though IMO the second one is more important because it will allow you to be happy on the way and after you’ve made the changes you’d like in your life.

      • afraid_of_zombies@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        You can look at people who most would consider great examples of success and still find miserable people and suicides

        Human happiness rises to about 130k USD a year. After that it is diminishing returns. You can point to all the tortured billionaires you want but there is plenty of misery in being poor.

        they either think there’s nothing more they can chase

        There must be hundreds of reachable achievements and skills the average Westerner can pursue. You want a challenge? Go learn violin. I will see you in about 12k-14k hours.

    • gelberhut@lemdro.id
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      1 year ago

      This sounds like playing with words for me.

      If you are not happy right now, then moving from your current state “not happy” to state “happy” is a goal. And during this transformation you become happy.

      So, even if the happy is just a mental state, you still can become happy and can set target to reach this.

      • intensely_human@lemm.ee
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        1 year ago

        Buddhism is based on experience. When people just read books that try to convey the un-conveyable, it looks like word games. Then they repeat those word games thinking they’re spreading the wisdom.

          • intensely_human@lemm.ee
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            1 year ago

            It’s nothing otherworldly; it’s just beyond words. Like the flavor of garlic. You literally can’t understand it except by putting garlic on your tongue. “Well it’s uh kinda like cheese and also like onion. Like a cheesy onion”

            “Oh yeah garlic is a cheesy onion! I get it now!”

            No. Just eat the garlic. It’s the only way to know.

      • afraid_of_zombies@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        You got it exactly right. Lower your expectations and they will be lowered. You don’t need mystical insight to grasp this.

        There probably is some worth to the idea. If you can’t get something fixating on it isn’t going to do you much good also it is unwise to keep following every shiny thing in hopes that this new one will fix everything.

        So yeah don’t buy that cryptocurrency promoted by a DJ, don’t blame your partner for your bad day at work, and if you can’t fix part of your past it is best not to dwell on it.

        Look at me. I am Guru now.

      • AA5B@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        It connects back to that proverb “money can’t buy happiness”. Having sufficient money can certainly remove many issues preventing happiness, but if you make money your goal or even removing a particular issue your goal, you may have bettered your life by removing those obstacles but aren’t necessarily “happy”

        • gelberhut@lemdro.id
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          1 year ago

          Fully agree that money or other similar goals do not buy happines. But there are goals as well. Like stop being unhappy and become happy. And there are steps one can follow to reach this goal.

    • bouh@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      That’s common philosophy. Only the most materialistic philosophy like consumerism will promote the never-ending pursuit of acquisition or achievement to happyness.

      That’s the problem of our western societies in fact: they promote the never-ending pursuit of success, wealth, or fame. To actually be happy, you “merely” need to get out of this culture.

      Still, and although some people can be happy with almost nothing, most people will still need basic needs fulfilled to be happy : food, home, and socialisation (and safety).

      • afraid_of_zombies@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Having seen both cultures I know which I will always choose. I like hot water when I shower, I like not seeing sewage in the streets, I like building creating and innovating, I like not being torn between mindless repetitive work on one hand and lazy do everything slow on the other. It is pretty easy for people in the privileged West to be romantic about the grinding poverty that are Buddhist nations.

        But hey it isn’t like I matter. Let’s look at where the net migration patterns say.