Your mother sounds like an amazing woman. I’m sorry to hear everything she (and you and your siblings) had to go through. It takes incredible resolve to survive all that.
As someone who’s had poor health their entire life, I can absolutely agree that the ‘tender moments’ really make life what it is.
Thanks for sharing.
I’ve noticed over the last few decades that every time I start worrying about WW3, climate change, solar flares, super volcanos, giant meteors etc. that there’s something going on in my personal life that’s causing me stress. Something I feel like I have no control over.
I guess my brain doesn’t want to admit/deal with my own issues, so I focus on something else, something that feels just as overwhelming.
Working on taming the anxiety itself is quite useful, especially if you can’t help the situation you’re currently in.
The things that have helped me the most are: meditating (chakra and mindfulness) which has been great at helping me calm down; finding activities that feel meaningful to me; spending time with the people I care about (making the time); and finding beauty and/or amusement in everyday life.
All of these things take practice and time, which might seem useless if you think that the world will end tomorrow. But even if all you can do is one meaningful/fulfilling thing today, then it will improve your day and help make your last day on earth a little better.
Of course chances are good you’ll wake up tomorrow, and the next day etc., which means you have even more time to live an even happier life.
Good luck my dude.
Mashed, with butter and garlic scapes.
For decades there was a funeral parlor down the street from my house. Right in the middle of a busy residential neighborhood in the city. There’s only on-street parking and they had two spots in front of their building reserved for funerals. Only no one ever parked there. No cars, limos, hearses, anything. A neon open sign turned on every day over their door but no one ever came or went.
My parents had a tenant who was an elderly gentleman with few relatives. When he died, my mom called the parlor to arrange the funeral but no one answered. She left a message on their machine but no one ever called back. We weren’t fully surprised because we’d been calling it a front for years, but mom was unconvinced until then.
The building got fully renovated a few years ago and we actually saw a funeral taking place, so they’ve upped their game.
My dad and I were shopping at Home Depot one December and found a small Christmas decoration I wanted. When we got it to the register the cashier couldn’t find a tag or sticker on it. Normally I’d go get another one with a tag but this was the only one they had. The cashier tried looking it up through the computer system but still couldn’t figure it out. She handed it to us and told us it was free because it was the store’s fault that she couldn’t find the price.
We’ve been enjoying that decoration for years, my mom still puts it in the middle of her kitchen display. And we always remember how nice that cashier was to us.
Oh my God. My family quotes that all the time and I had no idea where it was from. My parents loved Dave so that makes since. Thanks for clearing that up for me!
“Some is better than none.” -My motto throughout college.
Usually I was stressed by the number of chapters I had to read, or pages I had to write. Instead of shutting down and not doing anything, I would tell myself to just read a single page or write a paragraph because any amount of work done is better than nothing.
Now I apply it to work and chores.